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What better way to celebrate Valentine's Day than to consider the elements of what makes love real. For the past few months, TRINICY Contributor David Kowalke has been hard at work on a three-part article series on this very subject. Check out the video teasers, the article outlines, and the link to the full articles below! Pssst... Make sure to scroll to the very end to read a very special dedication message. part i: relational pattern, faith, & freedom
Part 1 Main Points
THE DIVINE BLUEPRINT FOR RELATIONSHIPS (RELATIONAL PATTERN) 1 Corinthians 3:9: “For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, God’s building.” THE FOUNDATION CALLED “JESUS” (RELATIONAL FAITH) 1 Corinthians 3:11: “For no man can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.” WALL #1 CALLED “FORGIVENESS” (RELATIONAL FREEDOM) Ephesians 4:31-32: “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.” Read the full Part I article HERE. part iI: relatonal example & balance
Part II Main Points
WALL #2 CALLED “GRACE & TRUTH” (RELATIONAL EXAMPLE) John 1:14: “The Word became flesh and made His dwelling among us. We have seen His glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.” WALL #3 CALLED “PRIORITIES” (RELATIONAL BALANCE) Colossians 3:22, 23: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.” Read the full Part II article HERE. part III: relational mandate & success
Part III Main Points
WALL #4 CALLED "AGAPE" (RELATIONAL MANDATE) John 13: 34-35: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even [just] as I have loved you, that you love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” THE ROOF CALLED BLESSING (RELATIONAL SUCCESS) 1 Peter 2:4-5: "Coming to Him as to a living stone, rejected indeed by men, but chosen by God and precious, you also, as living stones, are being built up a spiritual house, a holy priesthood, to offer up spiritual sacrifices acceptable to God through Jesus Christ." Read the full Part III article HERE. special dedication
This three-part article is dedicated to my wife Cindy, who has persisted with me for 43 years. Her strength, patience and example of love has been to me my courage, my hope, and my vision of Jesus in this life. Thank you. I love you.
Want to write for trinicy?
If you are interested in writing for TRINICY, please email us at [email protected]. We would love to hear from faithful servants of the Kingdom who have the desire and talent to communicate the word of God in a way that is relevant to our conservative Christian students, scholars, staff, and supporters!
1 Comment
 If you haven't yet, please review Part I HERE and Part II HERE before proceeding to the last article in the series! part III: the building |
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By David M. Kowalke, Jr. |@hongkongkowalke | TRINICY.org
“Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal,
but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.
Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.
But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward
what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which
God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 3:12-14
but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.
Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it.
But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward
what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which
God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."
- Philippians 3:12-14
Time is like a good friend, or like a bad cold. You are conscious of it wherever you go. We refer to it in almost everything we talk about. We live in it and we will die in it. In some ways, it is like Love. You can’t see it, but you can see its effect. You can’t smell it, but many smells transport you to another place by it. You can’t taste it, but it can rob you of hunger.
You can’t hear it, but its beckoning is loud. You can’t touch it, but its effect on your life is undeniable!
It is undeniable that I am no Albert Einstein or Stephen Hawking, and that this is not a scientific treatise on the nature of time. However, as this year rolls inexorably into the next, I would like to suggest that, as I read this profound passage from Paul’s letter to the believers in Philippi, that there are at least these three observations to make about how we Christians deal with our place in time.
First, there is a forgetting. Aren’t we told over and over again in the Scriptures to remember things, such as the goodness and faithfulness of God and the destructive results of lives bound in sin? While we struggle to remember, it is also important to forget. We ought to forget the victories of the past and not rest on them by ignoring the need for us to trust God for today.
If we have seen Him ‘part the Red Sea’ in a particular area of our life, we need to continue to act by faith now for the ‘desert experience’ that we are dealing with. Also, we are to forget the sin that we have yielded to because we are told that in Christ, God remembers that sin no more. “Guilt” is when we acknowledge that we have offended the character of God. “Shame” is what Christ became in our place on the cross! Shame has no place in the believer’s life. What is the answer to forgetting the past? Learn from the Past, but don’t live in it!
Secondly, there is a straining. We are in a race for our lives! We are to reach forward today for the future that is tomorrow. There is a popular view today that we are to live in the moment, in the now. That is true, but not if the now is all that there is. What is the answer to straining forward? Live in the Now, but don’t live for it!
Thirdly, there is a future prize. Our goal is secure. The finish line is near. That is what makes our lives today of ultimate and infinite value. Without an assurance in knowing of the existence of a personal God who loves us, and who has entered into our experience at Bethlehem, to the Cross, through the empty Tomb, there is no ‘now’ worth living. How do we deal with the future? Strain for the Future, because we are designed for it!
In consideration of Time and our place in it, here are some questions we might ask: What in the past should I release that holds me back? What lessons have I learned from the past? What in the present ought I be doing that I have wrongly avoided? What can I do today that will move me forward? What in the future do I fear, and how should I deal with it? What in the future has God graciously prepared for me?
It is undeniable that I am no Albert Einstein or Stephen Hawking, and that this is not a scientific treatise on the nature of time. However, as this year rolls inexorably into the next, I would like to suggest that, as I read this profound passage from Paul’s letter to the believers in Philippi, that there are at least these three observations to make about how we Christians deal with our place in time.
First, there is a forgetting. Aren’t we told over and over again in the Scriptures to remember things, such as the goodness and faithfulness of God and the destructive results of lives bound in sin? While we struggle to remember, it is also important to forget. We ought to forget the victories of the past and not rest on them by ignoring the need for us to trust God for today.
If we have seen Him ‘part the Red Sea’ in a particular area of our life, we need to continue to act by faith now for the ‘desert experience’ that we are dealing with. Also, we are to forget the sin that we have yielded to because we are told that in Christ, God remembers that sin no more. “Guilt” is when we acknowledge that we have offended the character of God. “Shame” is what Christ became in our place on the cross! Shame has no place in the believer’s life. What is the answer to forgetting the past? Learn from the Past, but don’t live in it!
Secondly, there is a straining. We are in a race for our lives! We are to reach forward today for the future that is tomorrow. There is a popular view today that we are to live in the moment, in the now. That is true, but not if the now is all that there is. What is the answer to straining forward? Live in the Now, but don’t live for it!
Thirdly, there is a future prize. Our goal is secure. The finish line is near. That is what makes our lives today of ultimate and infinite value. Without an assurance in knowing of the existence of a personal God who loves us, and who has entered into our experience at Bethlehem, to the Cross, through the empty Tomb, there is no ‘now’ worth living. How do we deal with the future? Strain for the Future, because we are designed for it!
In consideration of Time and our place in it, here are some questions we might ask: What in the past should I release that holds me back? What lessons have I learned from the past? What in the present ought I be doing that I have wrongly avoided? What can I do today that will move me forward? What in the future do I fear, and how should I deal with it? What in the future has God graciously prepared for me?
prayer
Would you pray with me? Lord, who was, and is, and is to come, help me to lean on your grace and mercy to learn from yesterday, as I live today for the joy-filled tomorrow that, by your love, you have secured for me. I come in the strong name of Jesus, Amen.
WANT TO SUBMIT A DEVOTIONAL?
If you are interested in writing devotionals for TRINICY, please email us at [email protected]. We would love to hear from faithful servants of the Kingdom who have the desire and talent to communicate the word of God in a way that is relevant to our conservative Christian students, scholars, staff, and supporters!
By David M. Kowalke, Jr. | @hongkongkowalke | TRINICY.org
Photo by Randy Fath
- THE DIVINE BLUEPRINT FOR RELATIONSHIPS
- 1 Corinthians 3:9 “For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, God’s building.”
- THE FOUNDATION CALLED “JESUS” (RELATIONAL FAITH)
- 1 Corinthians 3:11 “For no man can lay a foundation other than the one which is laid, which is Jesus Christ.”
- WALL #1 CALLED “FORGIVENESS” (RELATIONAL FREEDOM)
- Ephesians 4:31-32 “Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you.”
PART II: THE BUILDING REAL RELATIONSHIPS
WALL #2: GRACE & TRUTH (RELATIONAL EXAMPLE)
To learn how to relate with one another in a real and harmonious way, we must see the example that Christ Himself displayed, both in His very nature, as well as His manner of life. As we find in John 1:1- 13, the pre-existent Word existed with God, and also was God. At the appointed time, as stated in verse 14, the Word became flesh and lived with people and took on human relationships with His creation while still existing as God.
Jesus, being God Himself, was also perfect man. John 1:14 says that He was, “full of grace and truth,” the only person to be so. Each one of us, while created in the image of God, struggles with personality traits, which, because of sin, are very much less than perfect. We are all able to act in ways that display grace and also in ways that display truth, but we are not in perfect balance as He is - full of grace and full of truth. When Jesus displayed truth, He did not set aside His ability to display grace, and vice versa. When He displayed attributes of justice - as when He drove the greedy moneychangers out of the temple - He did not abandon His love for them, nor His desire to show them grace. When he forgave the woman caught in adultery, He did not excuse the sin, but instead, forgave it. Personifying Truth He said, “Go and sin no more.”
What do grace and truth have to do with relationships? Grace and truth go together like wattle and daub! You might ask what that is. Wattle and daub were used as building materials in many medieval homes, i.e. William Shakespeare’s birthplace in Stratford-upon-Avon in central England. Wattle was made up of sticks that were woven together in a lattice. It was then “daubed” or packed and smeared with a concoction of soil, clay, straw and, yes, sometimes, even animal manure. These twins bonded together to create sturdy walls that have been found to last for hundreds of years!
Contrary to the person of Christ, we tend to be people of grace or truth. People of truth tend to be discerning, disciplined, and goal- and task- oriented. They also tend to be critical, say things like “But it’s the truth,” are not very sensitive to others, and sometimes see people as the obstacle to their goals. People of grace tend to be compassionate, considerate, and generous. They also tend to be naïve, undisciplined, too concerned about ‘feelings,’ and are more interested in ‘process’ than accomplishing necessary goals. If you don’t know if you are either a ‘truth person’ or a ‘grace person,’ just ask those closest to you. They already know! In fact, if they personally lean towards truth, they will probably be more than willing to give their clear and accurate opinion. If they tend towards grace, they might ‘hem and haw,’ flatter or compliment you first, and then couch their assessment, using something like, “Well, it’s just my opinion.”
It is here that many relationships struggle or break down. Complementary relationships are often not between people with the same personalities, abilities, and giftedness. When disagreements and strife are displayed, it often comes from the desire of one person to have the other person be like them. Relating to one another in authentic and helpful ways comes by understanding how Christ is, how we are wired, and the makeup of one another.
However, unity with peace is more than just “balancing each other out.” This might be an issue that needs attention for people who seek to be understood much more than they seek to understand. The goal of people wanting to live real relationships with one another ought not to be a search for uniformity but unity! Our goal is not to become like each other but to become like Christ, which unites us. The person who emphasizes truth does not need to try to be like the person who emphasizes grace, and vice versa. Instead, if we would yield ourselves to becoming like Christ, who is full of grace and truth, it is then that real relationships would be formed and we would experience intimacy and authenticity. How strong and tender those relationships would be!
As we build the Wall of Relationships called “Grace and Truth,” it will be then that we will be behaving more like Christ. Instead of trying to make others more like us, we would treat one another as though they were more important than ourselves (Philippians 2:3). Then, the Building called “Real Relationships” would stand strong, and we, people who will last forever, will bring honor to our Example, Jesus, full of grace and full of truth!
WALL #3: “PRIORITIES” (RELATIONAL BALANCE)
“She says that I don’t say ‘I love you’ anymore. I said that I loved her at the altar! If it changes, I’ll let her know.”
“I need to be at church every time the church doors are open!”
“It’s all about the children.”
“I work this much because I have to! I’ll get together with the kids really soon.”
“It’s up to me to run the show.”
“How can I love anyone unless I love myself first?!”
“I would rather burn out than rust out!”
“When we retire, that’s when we’ll have time for us.”
Question: Which of these statements has the potential for disaster in our most important relationships?
Answer: All of them!
Before you read any further, I would like to request that you stop reading, and get a piece of paper and a pencil. I have my doubts that many of you will take my suggestion and do so, but I will pretend that many did!
Now, write on the top of your paper: MY PRIORITIES. Now I would ask that you take the time you need and write down what you believe the priorities of your life are, in order of their importance. There is no need to prompt you as to content, so be as honest as you can. Name the things that are your priorities, and then in a separate list, write the things that ought to be your priorities
The list of your reality might seem shocking, or discouraging. I might be wrong, but I suspect that many of you, in your attempt at the ideal description of Priorities, have written a shopping list, of sorts. Instead of milk, eggs, bread, etc., you might have written something like: 1) God, 2) spouse, 3) family, 4) church, 5) work, 6) others 7) self, or a version of that. Some have said,
J esus
O thers
Y ourself = JOY!
If this is the formula for Joy, why is it that joy is so glaringly absent in so many of our relationships? Does this oversimplify the question of Priorities in our personal lives and our relationships, or could it be that it is not simple enough?
The problem with a ‘shopping list’ approach to prioritizing our lives is that one person’s priorities can vary wildly from another’s. Also, if we were to say that God was our number one priority, how could we ever get to the other things that are important in our lives? We would forever be working on that which we deem ‘God-issues’ since it is a goal that is never reached in this life, and we would never get to family, or work, or self. The all too common tragedy of neglected children by, typically, an absent-at-work father, is profoundly stated in the familiar 1974 song entitled, “Cat’s in the Cradle” by Harry Chapman. I highly recommend that everyone, especially parents of still young children, listen to the haunting song, (yes, now would be good) and especially take note of the last words in the final stanza. We are replicating what we show is important in our lives to the generation that is following.
If a ‘shopping list’ is impractical, what then is the solution? How do we live our lives in a way that builds Real Relationships in a world where the siren call of innumerable voices, many being good ones, beckon for our attention?
Imagine a pie - pumpkin, apple, or another. Cut the pie into as many pieces as there are priorities or important issues in your life that you need to give attention to, i.e. church, school, friends, housekeeping, spouse, hobby, family, sweetie, etc. Now, take a dollop of whipped cream or ice cream and plop it right in the middle of the pie. Look good?! Now, which piece of pie has any cream on it? The obvious answer is that they all do. Now imagine that the cream in the middle of the pie is labeled “Christ.” “He is also head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He Himself will come to have first place in everything” Colossians 1:18. This is a better image of the problem of prioritizing our lives. Our goal is not to go from one thing on our list and then, when we have fully attended to that, to go to the next. Instead, our goal is to live a balanced life by having only one priority, the priority of Christ Himself. When we are doing what we ought to concerning each issue (slice of pie) it will be Christ only that is our priority, as it touches each issue.
Certainly, to others it might look to them as though Family is more important than Church, or that Work is more important than Sweetie, etc. But if our priority is always Christ, and to honor Him, then there will be no imbalance, but instead fulfillment, peace, and joy. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving” Colossians 3:22-23. The Wall of Priorities will add peace, strength and permanence to the Building of Real Relationships.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Please watch out for part 3 of this series on Building Real Relationships:
To learn how to relate with one another in a real and harmonious way, we must see the example that Christ Himself displayed, both in His very nature, as well as His manner of life. As we find in John 1:1- 13, the pre-existent Word existed with God, and also was God. At the appointed time, as stated in verse 14, the Word became flesh and lived with people and took on human relationships with His creation while still existing as God.
Jesus, being God Himself, was also perfect man. John 1:14 says that He was, “full of grace and truth,” the only person to be so. Each one of us, while created in the image of God, struggles with personality traits, which, because of sin, are very much less than perfect. We are all able to act in ways that display grace and also in ways that display truth, but we are not in perfect balance as He is - full of grace and full of truth. When Jesus displayed truth, He did not set aside His ability to display grace, and vice versa. When He displayed attributes of justice - as when He drove the greedy moneychangers out of the temple - He did not abandon His love for them, nor His desire to show them grace. When he forgave the woman caught in adultery, He did not excuse the sin, but instead, forgave it. Personifying Truth He said, “Go and sin no more.”
What do grace and truth have to do with relationships? Grace and truth go together like wattle and daub! You might ask what that is. Wattle and daub were used as building materials in many medieval homes, i.e. William Shakespeare’s birthplace in Stratford-upon-Avon in central England. Wattle was made up of sticks that were woven together in a lattice. It was then “daubed” or packed and smeared with a concoction of soil, clay, straw and, yes, sometimes, even animal manure. These twins bonded together to create sturdy walls that have been found to last for hundreds of years!
Contrary to the person of Christ, we tend to be people of grace or truth. People of truth tend to be discerning, disciplined, and goal- and task- oriented. They also tend to be critical, say things like “But it’s the truth,” are not very sensitive to others, and sometimes see people as the obstacle to their goals. People of grace tend to be compassionate, considerate, and generous. They also tend to be naïve, undisciplined, too concerned about ‘feelings,’ and are more interested in ‘process’ than accomplishing necessary goals. If you don’t know if you are either a ‘truth person’ or a ‘grace person,’ just ask those closest to you. They already know! In fact, if they personally lean towards truth, they will probably be more than willing to give their clear and accurate opinion. If they tend towards grace, they might ‘hem and haw,’ flatter or compliment you first, and then couch their assessment, using something like, “Well, it’s just my opinion.”
It is here that many relationships struggle or break down. Complementary relationships are often not between people with the same personalities, abilities, and giftedness. When disagreements and strife are displayed, it often comes from the desire of one person to have the other person be like them. Relating to one another in authentic and helpful ways comes by understanding how Christ is, how we are wired, and the makeup of one another.
However, unity with peace is more than just “balancing each other out.” This might be an issue that needs attention for people who seek to be understood much more than they seek to understand. The goal of people wanting to live real relationships with one another ought not to be a search for uniformity but unity! Our goal is not to become like each other but to become like Christ, which unites us. The person who emphasizes truth does not need to try to be like the person who emphasizes grace, and vice versa. Instead, if we would yield ourselves to becoming like Christ, who is full of grace and truth, it is then that real relationships would be formed and we would experience intimacy and authenticity. How strong and tender those relationships would be!
As we build the Wall of Relationships called “Grace and Truth,” it will be then that we will be behaving more like Christ. Instead of trying to make others more like us, we would treat one another as though they were more important than ourselves (Philippians 2:3). Then, the Building called “Real Relationships” would stand strong, and we, people who will last forever, will bring honor to our Example, Jesus, full of grace and full of truth!
WALL #3: “PRIORITIES” (RELATIONAL BALANCE)
“She says that I don’t say ‘I love you’ anymore. I said that I loved her at the altar! If it changes, I’ll let her know.”
“I need to be at church every time the church doors are open!”
“It’s all about the children.”
“I work this much because I have to! I’ll get together with the kids really soon.”
“It’s up to me to run the show.”
“How can I love anyone unless I love myself first?!”
“I would rather burn out than rust out!”
“When we retire, that’s when we’ll have time for us.”
Question: Which of these statements has the potential for disaster in our most important relationships?
Answer: All of them!
Before you read any further, I would like to request that you stop reading, and get a piece of paper and a pencil. I have my doubts that many of you will take my suggestion and do so, but I will pretend that many did!
Now, write on the top of your paper: MY PRIORITIES. Now I would ask that you take the time you need and write down what you believe the priorities of your life are, in order of their importance. There is no need to prompt you as to content, so be as honest as you can. Name the things that are your priorities, and then in a separate list, write the things that ought to be your priorities
The list of your reality might seem shocking, or discouraging. I might be wrong, but I suspect that many of you, in your attempt at the ideal description of Priorities, have written a shopping list, of sorts. Instead of milk, eggs, bread, etc., you might have written something like: 1) God, 2) spouse, 3) family, 4) church, 5) work, 6) others 7) self, or a version of that. Some have said,
J esus
O thers
Y ourself = JOY!
If this is the formula for Joy, why is it that joy is so glaringly absent in so many of our relationships? Does this oversimplify the question of Priorities in our personal lives and our relationships, or could it be that it is not simple enough?
The problem with a ‘shopping list’ approach to prioritizing our lives is that one person’s priorities can vary wildly from another’s. Also, if we were to say that God was our number one priority, how could we ever get to the other things that are important in our lives? We would forever be working on that which we deem ‘God-issues’ since it is a goal that is never reached in this life, and we would never get to family, or work, or self. The all too common tragedy of neglected children by, typically, an absent-at-work father, is profoundly stated in the familiar 1974 song entitled, “Cat’s in the Cradle” by Harry Chapman. I highly recommend that everyone, especially parents of still young children, listen to the haunting song, (yes, now would be good) and especially take note of the last words in the final stanza. We are replicating what we show is important in our lives to the generation that is following.
If a ‘shopping list’ is impractical, what then is the solution? How do we live our lives in a way that builds Real Relationships in a world where the siren call of innumerable voices, many being good ones, beckon for our attention?
Imagine a pie - pumpkin, apple, or another. Cut the pie into as many pieces as there are priorities or important issues in your life that you need to give attention to, i.e. church, school, friends, housekeeping, spouse, hobby, family, sweetie, etc. Now, take a dollop of whipped cream or ice cream and plop it right in the middle of the pie. Look good?! Now, which piece of pie has any cream on it? The obvious answer is that they all do. Now imagine that the cream in the middle of the pie is labeled “Christ.” “He is also head of the body, the church; and He is the beginning, the firstborn from the dead, so that He Himself will come to have first place in everything” Colossians 1:18. This is a better image of the problem of prioritizing our lives. Our goal is not to go from one thing on our list and then, when we have fully attended to that, to go to the next. Instead, our goal is to live a balanced life by having only one priority, the priority of Christ Himself. When we are doing what we ought to concerning each issue (slice of pie) it will be Christ only that is our priority, as it touches each issue.
Certainly, to others it might look to them as though Family is more important than Church, or that Work is more important than Sweetie, etc. But if our priority is always Christ, and to honor Him, then there will be no imbalance, but instead fulfillment, peace, and joy. “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving” Colossians 3:22-23. The Wall of Priorities will add peace, strength and permanence to the Building of Real Relationships.
TO BE CONTINUED...
Please watch out for part 3 of this series on Building Real Relationships:
- WALL #4 CALLED “AGAPE” (RELATIONAL MANDATE)
- THE ROOF CALLED “BLESSING” (RELATIONAL SUCCESS)
- SUMMARY
By David M. Kowalke Jr. | @hongkongkowalke | TRINICY.org
 | BASIC QUESTIONS
|
BASIC QUESTIONS cont.
FOUNDATION QUESTIONS
TRINICY: Out of all God’s attributes, which one amazes you most? Why?
DAVID: While there is no one thing about God that is greater than another, the Sovereignty of God draws from me a huge sense of wonder! Since the incommunicable attributes of God are for Him alone, I cannot, nor will ever, know what absolute Sovereignty is. While God does not cause everything to happen, i.e. sin, nothing happens that He does not allow. Therefore, at the end of time, the evil, neutral, and the good will neither thwart, nor determine the Purposes of God, but He alone Wills. “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21
TRINICY: Who led you to Christ? Who are you leading or hope to lead to Christ?
DAVID: I was a Senior at The American School in London, England, 1971/72. It was there I began attending a youth ministry that was begun by John and Kathy Riggs, graduates from Florida Bible College. While I had for a long time been spiritually sensitive, it was in that ministry, mainly to American high school students, that I understood, clearly for the first time, that salvation was solely by grace through faith in Christ alone.
While only Christ saves, it has been my life-purpose to witness to the grace and mercy that are mine in Christ. There have been times I have been a planter, sometimes one who waters and sometimes the reaper. My goal throughout a day is to be sensitive to the spiritual condition of those I encounter. Who do I hope to lead to Christ?...any who don’t know Him!!
Psalm 71:17-19 sums up my desire, as a grey-headed man, to pass on the gospel, which I responded to as a young man, to others, young and old, and to those who will respond to Jesus through them.
- Professions: Youth Ministry Leader, London, England; Church Planter, Birmingham, England & Richmond, VA; Pastor, Richmond VA; Christian High-School Teacher Systematic Theology to Sophomores, Raleigh, NC
FOUNDATION QUESTIONS
TRINICY: Out of all God’s attributes, which one amazes you most? Why?
DAVID: While there is no one thing about God that is greater than another, the Sovereignty of God draws from me a huge sense of wonder! Since the incommunicable attributes of God are for Him alone, I cannot, nor will ever, know what absolute Sovereignty is. While God does not cause everything to happen, i.e. sin, nothing happens that He does not allow. Therefore, at the end of time, the evil, neutral, and the good will neither thwart, nor determine the Purposes of God, but He alone Wills. “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the LORD’s purpose that prevails.” Proverbs 19:21
TRINICY: Who led you to Christ? Who are you leading or hope to lead to Christ?
DAVID: I was a Senior at The American School in London, England, 1971/72. It was there I began attending a youth ministry that was begun by John and Kathy Riggs, graduates from Florida Bible College. While I had for a long time been spiritually sensitive, it was in that ministry, mainly to American high school students, that I understood, clearly for the first time, that salvation was solely by grace through faith in Christ alone.
While only Christ saves, it has been my life-purpose to witness to the grace and mercy that are mine in Christ. There have been times I have been a planter, sometimes one who waters and sometimes the reaper. My goal throughout a day is to be sensitive to the spiritual condition of those I encounter. Who do I hope to lead to Christ?...any who don’t know Him!!
Psalm 71:17-19 sums up my desire, as a grey-headed man, to pass on the gospel, which I responded to as a young man, to others, young and old, and to those who will respond to Jesus through them.
17 O God, from my youth you have taught me, and I still proclaim
your wondrous deeds. 18 So even to old age and gray hairs, O God,
do not forsake me, until I proclaim your might to another generation,
your power to all those to come. 19 Your righteousness, O God,
reaches the high heavens. You who have done great things,
O God, who is like you?
your wondrous deeds. 18 So even to old age and gray hairs, O God,
do not forsake me, until I proclaim your might to another generation,
your power to all those to come. 19 Your righteousness, O God,
reaches the high heavens. You who have done great things,
O God, who is like you?
TRINICY: What primary gift(s) has God given you? How are you using them for the kingdom?
DAVID: There is a difference between Personality, Ability, Passion and Spiritual Gifts. It is important to know the differences and similarities between them. I am a relational person, and that is evident in my personality, abilities, and passion, both pro and con! My spiritual gifts, which I believe are given by the Spirit to believers at salvation, are pastor/teacher and mercy. I have sought to use all the ways the Lord has made me and gifted me in the ministries and other jobs I have been involved with, as youth pastor, church-planter, pastor, and Christian high school teacher. As I am retired now, as I drive periodically with UBER, I daily have opportunities to meet and talk with people in conversations that often lead to amazing spiritual encounters!
TRINICY: Which person from the Bible do you resonate with the most? Why?
DAVID: It must be David. Of course we share the same name, but from my childhood on, through my ‘seeker’ years and into my life as a follower of Jesus, even until today, there are many things that I look to and have learned from. It would take a long autobiographical book to unfold how the Lord has used David in my life, but I will arbitrarily pick three examples.
First, I remember seeing David as a rather unimpressive person at first. I was very shy as a boy and when I would hear of David working as a lowly shepherd boy standing up to monstrous Goliath, I would wish for that kind of bravery. God steps into the one-sided conversation and challenge from Goliath to have the Israelites present their champion to do battle with him to determine the winner between the Israelites and the Philistines He says that David can ‘rest easy’, stand up to Goliath and to let Himself deliver Goliath into David’s hands. And He tells him why...SO THAT THE WORLD WILL KNOW THAT THERE IS A GOD IN ISRAEL! When this account (and no, it is not a Bible story, but a historical event) is put alongside the passage by Paul in 1 Corinthians 1:18-31, I am encouraged to see that God relishes in using foolish people, weak people, base and unimpressive people, as well as ‘dedicated nobodies’ as His tools and weapons! That means He can use me!
Second, I, like most people, am aware of David’s sin with Bathsheba. When we ask, “What was David’s great sin?” the answer comes back, “Adultery!” We often forget the awful sin of David murdering Bathsheba’s husband! How could he think of, plan, and execute such a diabolical sin...the way we, too, do ours! It is the sorrow and confession in Psalm 51 that brings true and complete forgiveness, cleansing and healing to what David calls his “crushed bones”! When I see my sin the way God sees it, our relationship is completely restored!
Third, David’s identity was bound up in his relationship with the Lord, not in his feelings or his failings. David was not Adulterer, nor Murderer. Acts 13:22 “...He made David their king. God testified concerning him: ‘I have found David son of Jesse, A MAN AFTER MY OWN HEART. He will do everything I want him to do.’” Who I am is bound up in Whose I am!
TRINICY: What social issue do you care most about? Why?
DAVID: Abortion. Every social issue should be affected by a biblical world-view, but this one will not leave me alone as that which I see to be the most egregious. I was at the March for Life in Washington DC years ago and in Richmond, VA in 2019 and I speak out when I can. We can speak the truth in love, but without love, the argument for Life will not be heard. Many of my posts on Instagram address this issue. To explain why this is so important would take more than this venue, but suffice it to say that it demonstrates how a person with a Godless world-view will “strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel”!
TRINICY-RELATED QUESTIONS
TRINICY: What does being a Christian mean to you? Why are you a Christian?
DAVID: My being a Christian is a personal necessity. Martin Luther, when confronted on his Sola Fide and Sola Scriptura positions, said, “Here I stand, I can do no other!” I don’t define God by my experiences, and who I am. It is God who defines my experiences, and who I am. The existence of a personal God is evident, so that man is “without excuse”. It is not so much that I have chosen to accept Christ; it is that I cannot deny who He is, that He is the Creator, that He loved me enough to accept me, just as I am, and loves me enough not to leave me just as I am! A life of obedience ought to be my expression of gratitude and worship to Christ.
TRINICY: What does being a Conservative mean to you? Why are you a Conservative?
DAVID: We are told, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” While I believe that all Scripture was God-breathed, I also believe that the U.S. Constitution was perhaps the most well crafted document written by men. Our country was founded on God and Freedom. I believe that “government governs best that governs least”. Therefore, I believe that we should ‘conserve’, or preserve the original meaning of that document. It is not so much a Party that I am a part of. The far left (Communism) and the far right (Fascism) are both totalitarian and godless philosophies. True conservatism is best spelled out in The Constitution and The Bill of Rights. I could be a true conservative and still end up rejecting the two main parties. I will give to Caesar what is Caesar’s, but I will give to God what is God’s.
TRINICY: What has your experience been like as a Conservative Christian on and/or off campus?
DAVID: This question does not apply much to my experience as a conservative Christian on campus, since I graduated from a Bible college and a seminary. However, in the secular world in which we live, two things stand out to me. First, the humanist culture that is absolutely contrary to a Christian world-view displays the blind arrogance that would silence decent and respectful conversation in almost every arena. This is exemplified in many ways, such as limiting freedom of speech, controlling the dissemination of information and the attempt to act as ‘thought police’ among our youth, in particular. Second is the tightly held-to philosophy that there are no absolutes and that one cannot be sure of anything. The person who espouses this philosophy ought to be asked, “Are you sure?!!”
TRINICY: What were your first thoughts when you heard about TRINICY?
DAVID: The very first was, “How do you pronounce that?!” But seriously, I thought that the minds of the future leaders of the world (and of their families) are being molded and shaped, both unintentionally and intentionally. Upon the distorted altar of ‘fairness’, ‘safety’, ‘toleration’ and a personal sense of ‘entitlement’ is the pursuit of Truth, and He who is TRUTH. God does not promise knowledge or understanding to the mocker or the scoffer. But to those who would seek Him with their whole heart, He says, “they will find Me!” These young adults need and deserve our undying love and support! Cindy (my precious wife of almost 43 years) and I have four amazing children and spouses, and 9+ grandchildren who are way above average! The goal of my life is to be faithful to Psalm 71:17-19, and to invest in our children, and in our children’s children, forever! When I hear of and meet with previous students from North Raleigh Christian Academy who desire to stand up for Christ, I am in awe of the faithfulness of the Lord. 3 John 1:4 “I have no greater joy than this: to hear that my children are walking in truth.”
TRINICY: What advice or resource would you offer to fellow conservative Christians today?
DAVID: Know what the Truth is. Speak the truth in love. Love is not how one feels, nor if we like someone. My personal definition of Love that hung on my classroom wall is: “Love is wanting God’s best for someone, expecting nothing in return, believing it will probably cost you something.” Love is revolutionary. Love is “awful”! Jesus, in John 15 and John 17 said that the world will know if we are His disciples by the love we have, and that they will actually have the right to believe or reject that Jesus came in the flesh by the display of our unity! Salvation, the Christian Life and Mission are bound up in one word: “LOVE”. Nothing more. Nothing less.
OTHER QUESTIONS
TRINICY: What is an interesting/unusual fact most people don’t know about you?
DAVID: There are a number...I was born in Hong Kong, also lived in Japan, Sweden, the U.S. and the U.K. Please Google “What is the most boring day in history?” The answer will come: April 11th, 1954. THAT IS MY BIRTHDAY! HOW RUDE!
TRINICY: What passion or dream keeps you up at night or wakes you up in the morning?
DAVID: Truly: How can I make a difference today and will I be able to see the purposefulness of today when I go to bed tonight? Without a life of significance, I die inside.
TRINICY: If Jesus were physically here now, what would you want to ask Him or talk about?
DAVID: “What do You want me to know?”
TRINICY: What are the three greatest life lessons you’ve learned thus far?
DAVID: Of course, impossible to answer specifically or completely, but:
TRINICY: What legacy do you want to leave as a Christian?
DAVID: Wow. Legacies, like funerals, are for those who remain and to determine. However, I wouldn’t mind if it were said of me, “See how he Loved.”
DAVID: There is a difference between Personality, Ability, Passion and Spiritual Gifts. It is important to know the differences and similarities between them. I am a relational person, and that is evident in my personality, abilities, and passion, both pro and con! My spiritual gifts, which I believe are given by the Spirit to believers at salvation, are pastor/teacher and mercy. I have sought to use all the ways the Lord has made me and gifted me in the ministries and other jobs I have been involved with, as youth pastor, church-planter, pastor, and Christian high school teacher. As I am retired now, as I drive periodically with UBER, I daily have opportunities to meet and talk with people in conversations that often lead to amazing spiritual encounters!
TRINICY: Which person from the Bible do you resonate with the most? Why?
DAVID: It must be David. Of course we share the same name, but from my childhood on, through my ‘seeker’ years and into my life as a follower of Jesus, even until today, there are many things that I look to and have learned from. It would take a long autobiographical book to unfold how the Lord has used David in my life, but I will arbitrarily pick three examples.
First, I remember seeing David as a rather unimpressive person at first. I was very shy as a boy and when I would hear of David working as a lowly shepherd boy standing up to monstrous Goliath, I would wish for that kind of bravery. God steps into the one-sided conversation and challenge from Goliath to have the Israelites present their champion to do battle with him to determine the winner between the Israelites and the Philistines He says that David can ‘rest easy’, stand up to Goliath and to let Himself deliver Goliath into David’s hands. And He tells him why...SO THAT THE WORLD WILL KNOW THAT THERE IS A GOD IN ISRAEL! When this account (and no, it is not a Bible story, but a historical event) is put alongside the passage by Paul in 1 Corinthians 1:18-31, I am encouraged to see that God relishes in using foolish people, weak people, base and unimpressive people, as well as ‘dedicated nobodies’ as His tools and weapons! That means He can use me!
Second, I, like most people, am aware of David’s sin with Bathsheba. When we ask, “What was David’s great sin?” the answer comes back, “Adultery!” We often forget the awful sin of David murdering Bathsheba’s husband! How could he think of, plan, and execute such a diabolical sin...the way we, too, do ours! It is the sorrow and confession in Psalm 51 that brings true and complete forgiveness, cleansing and healing to what David calls his “crushed bones”! When I see my sin the way God sees it, our relationship is completely restored!
Third, David’s identity was bound up in his relationship with the Lord, not in his feelings or his failings. David was not Adulterer, nor Murderer. Acts 13:22 “...He made David their king. God testified concerning him: ‘I have found David son of Jesse, A MAN AFTER MY OWN HEART. He will do everything I want him to do.’” Who I am is bound up in Whose I am!
TRINICY: What social issue do you care most about? Why?
DAVID: Abortion. Every social issue should be affected by a biblical world-view, but this one will not leave me alone as that which I see to be the most egregious. I was at the March for Life in Washington DC years ago and in Richmond, VA in 2019 and I speak out when I can. We can speak the truth in love, but without love, the argument for Life will not be heard. Many of my posts on Instagram address this issue. To explain why this is so important would take more than this venue, but suffice it to say that it demonstrates how a person with a Godless world-view will “strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel”!
TRINICY-RELATED QUESTIONS
TRINICY: What does being a Christian mean to you? Why are you a Christian?
DAVID: My being a Christian is a personal necessity. Martin Luther, when confronted on his Sola Fide and Sola Scriptura positions, said, “Here I stand, I can do no other!” I don’t define God by my experiences, and who I am. It is God who defines my experiences, and who I am. The existence of a personal God is evident, so that man is “without excuse”. It is not so much that I have chosen to accept Christ; it is that I cannot deny who He is, that He is the Creator, that He loved me enough to accept me, just as I am, and loves me enough not to leave me just as I am! A life of obedience ought to be my expression of gratitude and worship to Christ.
TRINICY: What does being a Conservative mean to you? Why are you a Conservative?
DAVID: We are told, “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” While I believe that all Scripture was God-breathed, I also believe that the U.S. Constitution was perhaps the most well crafted document written by men. Our country was founded on God and Freedom. I believe that “government governs best that governs least”. Therefore, I believe that we should ‘conserve’, or preserve the original meaning of that document. It is not so much a Party that I am a part of. The far left (Communism) and the far right (Fascism) are both totalitarian and godless philosophies. True conservatism is best spelled out in The Constitution and The Bill of Rights. I could be a true conservative and still end up rejecting the two main parties. I will give to Caesar what is Caesar’s, but I will give to God what is God’s.
TRINICY: What has your experience been like as a Conservative Christian on and/or off campus?
DAVID: This question does not apply much to my experience as a conservative Christian on campus, since I graduated from a Bible college and a seminary. However, in the secular world in which we live, two things stand out to me. First, the humanist culture that is absolutely contrary to a Christian world-view displays the blind arrogance that would silence decent and respectful conversation in almost every arena. This is exemplified in many ways, such as limiting freedom of speech, controlling the dissemination of information and the attempt to act as ‘thought police’ among our youth, in particular. Second is the tightly held-to philosophy that there are no absolutes and that one cannot be sure of anything. The person who espouses this philosophy ought to be asked, “Are you sure?!!”
TRINICY: What were your first thoughts when you heard about TRINICY?
DAVID: The very first was, “How do you pronounce that?!” But seriously, I thought that the minds of the future leaders of the world (and of their families) are being molded and shaped, both unintentionally and intentionally. Upon the distorted altar of ‘fairness’, ‘safety’, ‘toleration’ and a personal sense of ‘entitlement’ is the pursuit of Truth, and He who is TRUTH. God does not promise knowledge or understanding to the mocker or the scoffer. But to those who would seek Him with their whole heart, He says, “they will find Me!” These young adults need and deserve our undying love and support! Cindy (my precious wife of almost 43 years) and I have four amazing children and spouses, and 9+ grandchildren who are way above average! The goal of my life is to be faithful to Psalm 71:17-19, and to invest in our children, and in our children’s children, forever! When I hear of and meet with previous students from North Raleigh Christian Academy who desire to stand up for Christ, I am in awe of the faithfulness of the Lord. 3 John 1:4 “I have no greater joy than this: to hear that my children are walking in truth.”
TRINICY: What advice or resource would you offer to fellow conservative Christians today?
DAVID: Know what the Truth is. Speak the truth in love. Love is not how one feels, nor if we like someone. My personal definition of Love that hung on my classroom wall is: “Love is wanting God’s best for someone, expecting nothing in return, believing it will probably cost you something.” Love is revolutionary. Love is “awful”! Jesus, in John 15 and John 17 said that the world will know if we are His disciples by the love we have, and that they will actually have the right to believe or reject that Jesus came in the flesh by the display of our unity! Salvation, the Christian Life and Mission are bound up in one word: “LOVE”. Nothing more. Nothing less.
OTHER QUESTIONS
TRINICY: What is an interesting/unusual fact most people don’t know about you?
DAVID: There are a number...I was born in Hong Kong, also lived in Japan, Sweden, the U.S. and the U.K. Please Google “What is the most boring day in history?” The answer will come: April 11th, 1954. THAT IS MY BIRTHDAY! HOW RUDE!
TRINICY: What passion or dream keeps you up at night or wakes you up in the morning?
DAVID: Truly: How can I make a difference today and will I be able to see the purposefulness of today when I go to bed tonight? Without a life of significance, I die inside.
TRINICY: If Jesus were physically here now, what would you want to ask Him or talk about?
DAVID: “What do You want me to know?”
TRINICY: What are the three greatest life lessons you’ve learned thus far?
DAVID: Of course, impossible to answer specifically or completely, but:
- Not the older I get, but the more I grow, the more I don’t want to ‘be’ God, but that I am more and more content to let Him be God.
- I don’t want to live in the past, but I want to learn from it. I don’t want to live for the present, but I want to live in it I want to live for the future, because I was made for it.
- Live LOVE. He is enough!
TRINICY: What legacy do you want to leave as a Christian?
DAVID: Wow. Legacies, like funerals, are for those who remain and to determine. However, I wouldn’t mind if it were said of me, “See how he Loved.”
WE WOULD LOVE TO FEATURE MORE CONSERVATIVE CHRISTIANS ON TRINICY.
If you know of other conservative Christians on or off campus we could feature, please email us at [email protected].
By David M. Kowalke Jr. | @hongkongkowalke | TRINICY.org
Photo by Randy Fath
re·al
/ˈrē(ə)l/
/ˈrē(ə)l/
“Relationships” is (and “are”) everything! Of the stuff in the world, only people and the Word of God will last forever. If this is so, why is it that we invest in and spend so much time and effort on those things that are fleeting?
There is a glaring lack of authenticity in the relationships that we see around us, among us, and in us. Image has transcended identity. The motto on the North Carolina Flag is, “Esse Quam Videri,” which means, “To be, rather than to seem [to be].” Relationships are all too often not what they seem to be. What seems to be is often only an illusion, and often a very elaborate one at that.
“Real” is defined in a number of ways. It can be defined as, “not artificial, fraudulent or illusory: Genuine, existent, authentic.” Remember in the movie, “The Matrix” when Neo asks Morpheus if the chair his hand is on is “real”? Morpheus responds, “What is real? How do you define “real”? If it is just [your senses] then it is just electrical signals interpreted by your brain...You have been living in a dream world, Neo.” He then reveals images of what seems to be a ‘normal’ world. He changes the picture and shows him images of decay and devastation. Morpheus then announces, “This is the world as it exists today...Welcome to the desert of the real”!
Could it be that the life that God designed for us to enjoy is now just a tragic distortion of what was meant to be? Have we become so accustomed to the dream, that the wonderful reality of what should be is no longer mourned for? Was the title of the bestselling book by Thomas Harris “I’m OK - You’re OK” a hollow mantra? We have strayed so far from the Garden that we have forgotten what it is like to “walk with God.”
Have we murdered our relationship with our brother ‘Abel’ in our day-to-day lives because of pride and jealousy? Are we now unable to look at our spouse with the same adoring eyes that first gazed on the unique and beautiful creation that God joined together in Eden? Why have we settled for a mere mirage in our relationships with God and people, instead of cultivating relationships that are truly rich, and real? We do not need to settle in the parched “desert of the real.”
Even the Word of God speaks of relationship, in the tri-unity of the Godhead, between God and His creation, and also between men and mankind. God is not interested in building monuments, except for those found in the trophies of His grace… His children (John 1:12). Jesus said that the world has the right to judge whether He came in the flesh through evidence of our unity (John 17:20-21).
While the American holiday of Thanksgiving, Christmas, and other holidays are upon us, this is not a ‘seasonal message’ but rather an every-day message. People will be gathering around the table with family and friends, and many humorous as well as tragic films are made of such gatherings because of the discussions and events that take place. If we do not address the interpersonal relationships we have, we are destined to sacrifice that which is most important in God’s economy: each other!
THE DIVINE BLUEPRINT FOR RELATIONSHIPS
It is not surprising that God would tolerate a relationship with His creation. It is surprising that He desires a relationship with us and so He designed us, in His image, to enjoy a personal relationship with Him! Are relationships all the same? Obviously not. There are different relationships with couples, spouses, family members, friends, social groups, etc. While we are created in the image of God - because of sin - that image is marred. Because of this, all relationships are ruptured and are in desperate need of reconciliation. There are, though, some principles that apply to all relationships.
If the noun “building” is used as a picture of healthy and real relationships, then the verb “building” of that Building is critical to it being a safe and long-standing structure. The foundation, the walls, and the roof are all essential to it completion. The wonderful metaphor seen in an Amish barn-raising is a beautiful picture of how relationships are built. It is only as a community of two or more come together that the ‘building of a building’ can take place in such a dramatic way. (The 1985 film Witness (R) starring Harrison Ford and Kelly McGillis is a dramatic example of this).
It is assumed that the owner of the new barn has laid the foundation, and it is after the walls are raised, in cooperation of those involved, that the roof can be supported. It is then that it is assumed that the owner is committed to work on completing the project.
There is a glaring lack of authenticity in the relationships that we see around us, among us, and in us. Image has transcended identity. The motto on the North Carolina Flag is, “Esse Quam Videri,” which means, “To be, rather than to seem [to be].” Relationships are all too often not what they seem to be. What seems to be is often only an illusion, and often a very elaborate one at that.
“Real” is defined in a number of ways. It can be defined as, “not artificial, fraudulent or illusory: Genuine, existent, authentic.” Remember in the movie, “The Matrix” when Neo asks Morpheus if the chair his hand is on is “real”? Morpheus responds, “What is real? How do you define “real”? If it is just [your senses] then it is just electrical signals interpreted by your brain...You have been living in a dream world, Neo.” He then reveals images of what seems to be a ‘normal’ world. He changes the picture and shows him images of decay and devastation. Morpheus then announces, “This is the world as it exists today...Welcome to the desert of the real”!
Could it be that the life that God designed for us to enjoy is now just a tragic distortion of what was meant to be? Have we become so accustomed to the dream, that the wonderful reality of what should be is no longer mourned for? Was the title of the bestselling book by Thomas Harris “I’m OK - You’re OK” a hollow mantra? We have strayed so far from the Garden that we have forgotten what it is like to “walk with God.”
Have we murdered our relationship with our brother ‘Abel’ in our day-to-day lives because of pride and jealousy? Are we now unable to look at our spouse with the same adoring eyes that first gazed on the unique and beautiful creation that God joined together in Eden? Why have we settled for a mere mirage in our relationships with God and people, instead of cultivating relationships that are truly rich, and real? We do not need to settle in the parched “desert of the real.”
Even the Word of God speaks of relationship, in the tri-unity of the Godhead, between God and His creation, and also between men and mankind. God is not interested in building monuments, except for those found in the trophies of His grace… His children (John 1:12). Jesus said that the world has the right to judge whether He came in the flesh through evidence of our unity (John 17:20-21).
While the American holiday of Thanksgiving, Christmas, and other holidays are upon us, this is not a ‘seasonal message’ but rather an every-day message. People will be gathering around the table with family and friends, and many humorous as well as tragic films are made of such gatherings because of the discussions and events that take place. If we do not address the interpersonal relationships we have, we are destined to sacrifice that which is most important in God’s economy: each other!
THE DIVINE BLUEPRINT FOR RELATIONSHIPS
It is not surprising that God would tolerate a relationship with His creation. It is surprising that He desires a relationship with us and so He designed us, in His image, to enjoy a personal relationship with Him! Are relationships all the same? Obviously not. There are different relationships with couples, spouses, family members, friends, social groups, etc. While we are created in the image of God - because of sin - that image is marred. Because of this, all relationships are ruptured and are in desperate need of reconciliation. There are, though, some principles that apply to all relationships.
If the noun “building” is used as a picture of healthy and real relationships, then the verb “building” of that Building is critical to it being a safe and long-standing structure. The foundation, the walls, and the roof are all essential to it completion. The wonderful metaphor seen in an Amish barn-raising is a beautiful picture of how relationships are built. It is only as a community of two or more come together that the ‘building of a building’ can take place in such a dramatic way. (The 1985 film Witness (R) starring Harrison Ford and Kelly McGillis is a dramatic example of this).
It is assumed that the owner of the new barn has laid the foundation, and it is after the walls are raised, in cooperation of those involved, that the roof can be supported. It is then that it is assumed that the owner is committed to work on completing the project.
1 Corinthians 3:9-11
"9 For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, you are God’s building.
10 According to the grace of God which was given to me, as a wise master builder I have laid the foundation, and another builds on it. But let each one take heed how he builds on it. 11 For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ."
"9 For we are God’s fellow workers; you are God’s field, you are God’s building.
10 According to the grace of God which was given to me, as a wise master builder I have laid the foundation, and another builds on it. But let each one take heed how he builds on it. 11 For no other foundation can anyone lay than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ."
THE FOUNDATION: “JESUS” (RELATIONAL FAITH)
This foundation is not found in a denomination, a sect, a statement of faith, nor a group of rituals. It is found in a Person. Whatever you think or know about the Billy Graham family, one thing that is dominant in their ministry is that the word “Jesus” comes from their mouths, perhaps as much as the word “God.” A correct relationship with God cannot be had your (our) way. It can only be enjoyed God’s way (1 Corinthians 2:12-14).
It is not enough to acknowledge the existence of God. We are told in Romans 1 that the existence of God is not something to be discovered, but something to be acknowledged, since the universe itself screams, “GOD!” to the extent that all mankind is, therefore, “without excuse.”
It is possible to believe in the existence and life of Jesus, but until someone places their faith in the person of Jesus as the One who became sin for them, paying infinitely for the punishment that they deserve and are unable to pay for, and that He rose from the dead to prove that the payment was sufficient, they are “condemned already” (John 3:16-18).
It is not that “God has a wonderful plan for your life,” and that if you just plug in Jesus, then all will be sweet, you will find Mr./Mrs. Right, your family will ‘get it together,’ you will get an ‘A’ in physics, your job will work out, and your lost dog will come home! It is that, only by knowing the Originator of intimate and infinite relationships that we can be equipped to enjoy them as they were designed to be.
It is not the existence and the example of Jesus that is in question. It is the identity of Jesus that is the issue. C. S. Lewis described it well when he said that Jesus was either a liar, who intentionally deceived people, and therefore evil itself, or a lunatic, a man on the level of someone who says they are a poached egg, or the Lord of Heaven. The option of saying that He was a “good man” is not open to us. He, then, the creator of all things (John 1:1-3, 14), is the only Foundation for Real Relationships.
WALL #1: “FORGIVENESS” (RELATIONAL FREEDOM)
So much of the lack of forgiveness in our lives is due to the lack of understanding of what forgiveness is, and what forgiveness is not. How many relationships are strained because of a lack of forgiveness? Who in our lives are we disconnected from and have a barrier between them and us?
There are so many ruptured homes, wounded marriages, and hopeless and desperate lives because of the absence of Forgiveness. Have you heard of, or have you yourself said, or has someone said to you the statement, “I will forgive you, but I will never forget”? How long has it been since you have been freed of the burden of a wounded or broken relationship? We can be instantaneously unburdened of this load of anger and resentment.
There are those who would say that one is not required to offer forgiveness to a person unless that person deserves it. This is because of their view of what forgiveness is based on. If forgiveness is based on a person deserving it, then we as sinners would not be able to be forgiven by God, because we do not deserve it! To receive grace is “to receive something that is not earned or deserved.”
Here is the main issue: Forgiveness is not primarily for the forgiven, but for the forgiver. God has forgiven us in Christ His Son because it is His holy character that has been violated. The result to the offender for the act of rebellion is separation. Forgiveness is offered by the offended so that there is a way for reconciliation. Forgiveness is choosing not to keep score anymore.
It is not divine amnesia! It is not that God cannot remember our sin, it is that He chooses to not hold sin against our account. This is how the “I forgive, but I cannot forget” problem is solved. Or course we can remember when someone has offended us. It is that we “choose not to keep score anymore” that we can forgive them, just as God the Father, in Jesus the Son, has forgiven us!
When we forgive ‘Aunt Martha’ before going to the Thanksgiving table, we are no longer bound by anger, resentment, or self-righteousness. All this because, since we are forgiven in Christ, we can also choose to keep score no longer. So, since we don’t have to wait until someone deserves to be forgiven, we can forgive them immediately because we ourselves have received from the Lord the forgiveness that we do not deserve, either! Then our relationships can be restored, and we no longer are burdened with anger and resentment and we are free!
However, remember what Forgiveness is not. Forgiveness is not pretending we have not been hurt. Forgiveness is not saying our emotions or bodies are healed. Forgiveness is not having to trust someone that might still be out to harm us, because trust is earned. Our freedom was earned and was paid for by the blood of Jesus. We have been freely forgiven! Be free!
TO BE CONTINUED...
Please watch out for parts 2 and 3 of this series on Building Real Relationships:
Please watch out for parts 2 and 3 of this series on Building Real Relationships:
- WALL #2: “GRACE & TRUTH” (RELATIONAL EXAMPLE)
- WALL #3: “PRIORITIES” (RELATIONAL BALANCE)
- WALL #4: “AGAPE” (RELATIONAL MANDATE)
- THE ROOF: “BLESSING” (RELATIONAL SUCCESS)
By David M. Kowalke, Jr. | TRINICY.org
Photo by Vlad Chețan
WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL?
As Halloween is upon us once again, culturally we slip into the assumption that it is an innocuous ‘holiday’, designed for children, but adopted, more and more, by adults. Is that so? Is it innocent of evil reference? Is it evil period? Why is it so popular? Where did it come from? Should it be celebrated? If so, how? Is it really a “hill to die on”?
DIGGING UP THE ROOTS
While most westerners are familiar with Halloween and its traditions, many are not aware of the days from which it derives its name. In and around the tenth and eleventh centuries, there had developed a belief (though not a biblical one), that some people were assured of heaven because of their good works and faith.
As Halloween is upon us once again, culturally we slip into the assumption that it is an innocuous ‘holiday’, designed for children, but adopted, more and more, by adults. Is that so? Is it innocent of evil reference? Is it evil period? Why is it so popular? Where did it come from? Should it be celebrated? If so, how? Is it really a “hill to die on”?
DIGGING UP THE ROOTS
While most westerners are familiar with Halloween and its traditions, many are not aware of the days from which it derives its name. In and around the tenth and eleventh centuries, there had developed a belief (though not a biblical one), that some people were assured of heaven because of their good works and faith.
Some of these were declared to be “Saints” and their ‘extra’ and, therefore, unneeded, good deeds were available to and could be purchased by those who were short of that which was required to secure salvation, including through penance and indulgences.
These saints were honored, venerated, and prayed to, and a holy day was set aside for this purpose called “All Saints’ Day” on the first of November. Later, a day was named to pray for all those faithful departed, and to emulate the good lives of the Saints for salvation. This was called “All Souls’ Day” on the second of November.
HOLY MOLY!
What about Halloween? “Hallow” means “holy.” The suffix “ween” was an abbreviation for the word “evening,” therefore referring to the evening before the day set aside for homage to the Saints. It was considered a night when Christians should pray for protection from the evil in the world. They would dress up in costumes of the Saints and act out the spiritual battle that takes place in the unseen world for the souls of men.
Here is the problem. These traditions are not Biblical and, therefore, were not given to believers. While there most definitely is a spirit world, Satan, angels, and fallen angels called “demons," “saints” should not be those declared to be so because of their good deeds. The Bible uses the word, “hagios” translated as “saint” or “holy one.” It describes and is the name for all those who have placed their faith in Jesus Christ as the promised God-man who paid for mankind’s sin by His substitutionary sacrifice and His shed blood on the cross, rising in three days to prove that the payment was sufficient. All believers are “saints” or “holy ones” - not based on their good deeds or merit, but based on the finished work of Jesus on the cross! I am not a saint because of my holy behavior, but because of my right standing in Christ, having been “set aside,” or “made holy,” for His purposes!
LUTHER NAILED IT!
Five hundred years later, a German monk named Martin Luther, after facing his unbearable sense of guilt and sin before a holy God, discovered in the book of Romans that “the just (or righteous) shall live by faith,” not by good works. He was so profoundly impacted by this discovery that he ultimately wrote out 95 reasons to teach that salvation is only purchased by the shed blood of Jesus Christ, and not by the coins dropped in the priests’ coffers to supposedly purchase the good deeds of the "saints."
These 95 reasons, or “theses,” were, as was the common practice, nailed to his home church’s door in Wittenberg.
When? On the 31st of October, 1517! This date has been adopted by many and has been renamed - no longer “Halloween” but Reformation Day! Many have adopted Reformation Sunday as a day to celebrate that we are no longer bound to fables and evil forces but to Christ, our Savior and Deliverer!
Martin Luther went on to translate the Bible into the German language, so that the common man, not just the educated priest, could see for himself that “the just shall live by faith”! Sola Scriptura! Only the Bible! Sola Fide! Only by Faith! Thus the winds of Reformation swept the country, the continent, and the world!
WITCHES, WICCA, WHATEVER!
Are there witches, those who practice the occult (that which is hidden)? Yes. What is Wicca? Dressed-up paganism. Is little Johnny ‘cute’ when he comes to the door dressed up in horns and a tail with a pitchfork saying, “Trick or Treat?!” Probably. However, beware! There is one prowling around seeking whom he may devour. This one should be terrifying to those who are not sealed with the Spirit of God.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Should Halloween be accepted as a cultural event? Should Halloween be repurposed as Reformation Day? Should we just let it go? Should we join the party? What will you do this Halloween or the next?
When Martin Luther was told to recant and deny the Gospel of grace through faith, he stood before the council and said that he could not speak against the Scriptures, which were so clear. He said, “Here I stand! I can do no other!”
Where do you stand?
These saints were honored, venerated, and prayed to, and a holy day was set aside for this purpose called “All Saints’ Day” on the first of November. Later, a day was named to pray for all those faithful departed, and to emulate the good lives of the Saints for salvation. This was called “All Souls’ Day” on the second of November.
HOLY MOLY!
What about Halloween? “Hallow” means “holy.” The suffix “ween” was an abbreviation for the word “evening,” therefore referring to the evening before the day set aside for homage to the Saints. It was considered a night when Christians should pray for protection from the evil in the world. They would dress up in costumes of the Saints and act out the spiritual battle that takes place in the unseen world for the souls of men.
Here is the problem. These traditions are not Biblical and, therefore, were not given to believers. While there most definitely is a spirit world, Satan, angels, and fallen angels called “demons," “saints” should not be those declared to be so because of their good deeds. The Bible uses the word, “hagios” translated as “saint” or “holy one.” It describes and is the name for all those who have placed their faith in Jesus Christ as the promised God-man who paid for mankind’s sin by His substitutionary sacrifice and His shed blood on the cross, rising in three days to prove that the payment was sufficient. All believers are “saints” or “holy ones” - not based on their good deeds or merit, but based on the finished work of Jesus on the cross! I am not a saint because of my holy behavior, but because of my right standing in Christ, having been “set aside,” or “made holy,” for His purposes!
LUTHER NAILED IT!
Five hundred years later, a German monk named Martin Luther, after facing his unbearable sense of guilt and sin before a holy God, discovered in the book of Romans that “the just (or righteous) shall live by faith,” not by good works. He was so profoundly impacted by this discovery that he ultimately wrote out 95 reasons to teach that salvation is only purchased by the shed blood of Jesus Christ, and not by the coins dropped in the priests’ coffers to supposedly purchase the good deeds of the "saints."
These 95 reasons, or “theses,” were, as was the common practice, nailed to his home church’s door in Wittenberg.
When? On the 31st of October, 1517! This date has been adopted by many and has been renamed - no longer “Halloween” but Reformation Day! Many have adopted Reformation Sunday as a day to celebrate that we are no longer bound to fables and evil forces but to Christ, our Savior and Deliverer!
Martin Luther went on to translate the Bible into the German language, so that the common man, not just the educated priest, could see for himself that “the just shall live by faith”! Sola Scriptura! Only the Bible! Sola Fide! Only by Faith! Thus the winds of Reformation swept the country, the continent, and the world!
WITCHES, WICCA, WHATEVER!
Are there witches, those who practice the occult (that which is hidden)? Yes. What is Wicca? Dressed-up paganism. Is little Johnny ‘cute’ when he comes to the door dressed up in horns and a tail with a pitchfork saying, “Trick or Treat?!” Probably. However, beware! There is one prowling around seeking whom he may devour. This one should be terrifying to those who are not sealed with the Spirit of God.
WHAT DO YOU THINK?
Should Halloween be accepted as a cultural event? Should Halloween be repurposed as Reformation Day? Should we just let it go? Should we join the party? What will you do this Halloween or the next?
When Martin Luther was told to recant and deny the Gospel of grace through faith, he stood before the council and said that he could not speak against the Scriptures, which were so clear. He said, “Here I stand! I can do no other!”
Where do you stand?